I Failed

The title of this post says it all.  I failed during the month of September.  At the beginning of the month, I had set the following goals for myself.  These are goals I wanted to accomplish before September was over.  Yes, I knew that some of these were ambitious.  But, I figure that it's better to reach high, try and fail...than it is to always aim low and succeed on a mediocre scale.

- Hit the gym five times per week, on average.
- Read one complete book.
- Lose 15 pounds.
- Blog all of my completed 101 in 1001 goals.
- Start the Thirty Day Shred again.

Overall, I didn't accomplish a single goal.  In fact, I failed miserably at all of these.  Here's my take on each goal.  They are not excuses, just reasons that I won't fall for again.

Gym - I was seriously the worst gym member of the month this month.  I barely went because I "couldn't find the time."  I was busy with the start of school and just didn't feel like going after a day's work.  Looking back, I wish I had pushed myself harder to get there.  It my have reduced some stress that I've had this month.  Oh well...here's just a promise to myself that I'll do better during October.

Read - I only read about 50 pages this month.  Total fail.

Lose - I only lost 5.8 pounds this month - which makes this probably the closest goal to completion.  Had I of gone to the gym more, I probably could have completed this goal.  I digress.  This is not about excuses.  I'm happy with those 5.8 pounds...and that brings me to having lost a total of 48.8 pounds since December 21st...and that, I'm totally thrilled about!

Blog - Total fail.  Didn't blog a single one.

Shred - Technically, I started the Thirty Day Shred again.  However, I don't think I can honestly say that only doing it one day is "starting it again."

And here's where it starts to get real.  100% truth.

When I made the decision to start blogging, I had been reading and following some blogs that I love and was excited to start my own blog journey.  I wanted to have this blog as an online journal for myself.  I wanted this to be a way to document my life so that later on, I could look back at all that I've accomplished.  Well, it became more than that.  I was pulled in with the "glitz and glam" of some of the more popular bloggers that I follow.  I wanted to be more like them.  I wanted a large blog following, I wanted people to read all my posts and leave a million comments.  I wanted to feel "rewarded" for my time spent blogging.  I participated in 'link ups' where you post about a topic that a fellow blogger started, and link up your blog on their page...and hope for people to find you among the masses and hopefully start to follow your blog.  I fell into a 'funk' when none of this was happening and I felt like my posts weren't good enough.  It's been a little while since I've posted anything on the blog, and during this time, some things have be going on in my life...that have been consuming my time, heart and mind.  This time away from the blog did, however, teach me something.  I realized again why I originally started blogging, where I had ended up in my thoughts about blogging and now I know that I need to reel it back in.  I've got some big changes and exciting events coming up in my life that I'm very excited about.  I'm going to continue blogging, but it's going to be a more personal journey for me.  If you decide to follow along and read my blog posts in the future, I'd love to have you.  But, I'm not going to be hurting for readers.

And that's a promise I'll keep.